Don't forget to maim yourself, please.

It is certainly a great honor to be working on this blog. So honorable in fact that I almost just disemboweled myself with a katana.

At times, I think of myself as a madman, yet other times, a sane human being. Neither of these could be further from the truth - as I am, in fact - not a human being at all, but merely the incomprehensibly depressed and tortured soul of a dead rat caught up in the eternal freezing damnation of a commercial aircon unit. In a back-street supermarket. In the bad part of town.

Well, that is how my life feels sometimes. Those are the good days.

But, let us not dwell on my problems. Let us dwell on yours. Who knows what my next post will bring? Perhaps a story you can relate to yourself. Perhaps it will make you cry. Maybe it will make you howl in anguish at a concrete wall. It may move you. It may even move you so much that it moves you right off the roof of a high-rise apartment and into midday traffic 13 stories below.

All you can do is wait, and hope my next post bears absolutely no resemblance to your own life.